Rat kids

Tonight, my favorite song is ‘Dont stop believing’ by Journey. In the guitar strings is our experience in this dark of the night. Rainy metro city concrete floors, concrete walls. Dark nights, cloudy days, spans of loneliness that lasts months on end. You’ve become an American boy, more than I’ve ever become an American girl. […]

Thought process; spring, plants, bears, goals

Hmmm, the tree leaf buds are growing. It makes the tree less stick-like and it’s starting to look more complex. The northern hemisphere of the earth is warming due to the earth’s tilt to the sun around this time. The air is chilly, but the ground is inevitably warm, so the plants are adapting and […]

Harsh realities of losing hope

Worn out and walking around Trying to open my eyes. All around, there’s the blind leading the blind and chickens with their heads cut off; whatever you want to call them. I’m caught in a slew of nothingness, or just too many things happening all at once. There’s no fine balance, but a brutal divide. […]

Chicken-broth like foreign scent and blinds

The rare subtle scent of something like mild diluted chicken-broth or a faraway whiff of miso soup does this to me. It took me years and years to figure out what this scent really could be, and up to today, I’m ninety-five percent sure that it’s related to meat; and most likely chicken. This rare, […]

Greasy pizza

We were little kids who sat in the school cafeteria during lunchtime. The cafeteria special that day, as it was every other day, was pizza. I used to think that pizza was a big deal, but the school pizza really, really sucked. I had a friend from Botswana next to me and a friend from […]

Fire curtain

It is a cruel and deserted world. Only stacks of papers funnel around you and I in this empty space. There’s something embedded within your cold demeanor. Your fake laughs, the way your hands shake when you lose control, your pointless hunger for power. We’re like mice roaming around in a dusty, cold, metallic warehouse. […]

The hazy blue world in Europe

She was a blonde high-school classmate who wanted to become a missionary one day. On the bus ride home, she told me about a time when someone she knew got into a car accident and almost became decapitated, or was decapitated. I eventually learned what that meant. Those days were cold and grey from what […]

Tune that I would’ve never chosen

I can’t believe I’m hearing this same old tune again. How long has it been, like twenty-some years? Is this what it’s like being old now? My, how I’ve grown… into something no less different. Blank eyed and coming of age, sitting in the car and looking out the car windshield; I once watched my […]

Surely dying

I’m sitting here on the empty Jacuzzi staring at the ceiling with water droplets spritzing near my face, as I try to feel fulfilled. In my room, I spray all types of scents to calm my senses but it just numbs me down. I have every material thing that I want and I make a […]

The wall

There’s always something blocking ahead. There’s always the wall; thick and made up of stones and concrete. I can kick it. I can try to punch it down with all my passion, but it just won’t collapse. I shiver and pace in this forsaken room. The lights are dim and the cold clouds claim and […]